As the big day approaches..

Soon my golu is going to be an year old.The count down has started..He is gonna be a big boy..and the age count will soon be years instead of months.Time files ..
The party planning has started.guest list is being made daily with some names deleted and some added.confusion prevails..who all to invite and whom to leave.

The party venues are being searched and discussions are on about the food.

Golu, unaware of all this, is busy with his mischiefs.
His participation is almost nil on this birthday of his..after few years we will be inviting his guests, hosting party at venue of his choice and food surely will be selected by him..

Strange, kids dont remember the most crucial year of their life and definately not their first birthday..
I think this one is surely for the parents..and they show off to the world..see We were able to survive the first year of parenthood!!!!

Learning to walk

Golu learnt to stand with support when he was just 7 months old.Gradually his confidence increased and I noticed that he can walk with support, holding the bed side or his favorite dressing table...
After that as the winter made its appearance, the clothes increased and so did the difficulty in managing his body.
At 9 months my baby learnt to stand, unsupported on his won two feet.Wow! that was a sight.I still couldnt believe my eyes that my baby is learning to stand.
Today he walked the longest distance on his own, a distance of whole 9 steps..
he is growing fast...

My guilt concious is increasing!!

Another morning...another tough situation.How to get out of the bed.Its so damn chilly outside and a small baby is sleeping holding my hand, clinging onto me. I pray, God please for today let my steeping out of the home and going to work be an easy task..

But there are times i think God favors babies.
I try to sneak out of the bed, trying to fool golu of my presence with a pillow.I tip toe out of the room and here comes a cry!!!.

This has become my everyday routine.Golu at 11 months is now more than intelligent to realise that his mom and dad with leave him and go to the office.
There will be hours where he will have to be with his grand parents(trust me they take care of him much more than what I can).

Golu's crankiness increases as the time for us to leave approaches.
When he sees me getting ready, he doesn't want to play or eat or drink anything.Only cling!!

Sneaking out of home doesn't seem right to me, but I am not left with any option.
Oh dear, at times I hate myself for wanting to work, for leaving him.His sad eyes penetrate my soul.
Its only me who knows how I leave him everyday and go to work.
I miss out on his acts of innocence, his naughtiness.
he expresses himself so well without even saying anything.

Someone has truely said " Eyes are the windows of soul"

I just wish someday I have the strength to hear his cries and not cry and be at peace with myself.

New territory won - Beds

My son is about to be 11 months old.Everyday he is becoming more cute. His acts full of inquisitiveness never fail to surprise me.
Every nook and corner of our house has to be explored by him.Kitchen is his favorite hang out.

Recently he has discovered how to climb down and up the bed. Another step towards freedom!!
He will do an inspection of all the corners of the bed, analyse them and then turn around and start crawling backwards....Holds the becd cover for support nd keeps on slipping don towards the floor till his feet touch the ground...
The sense of achievement he feels after each such climb, the look in his eyes is priceless....

He loves to crawl backwards these days...stop and look if anyone is watching him and then continue on to a new adventure....